IC Contact [ryslig]

[catphishing]

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, OLIVER. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 142.58.303.67 *** oliver has joined 142.58.303.67 <oliver> So this is my private channel. <oliver> Talk to me?

Current Usernames

<trashpanda>
<mothman>
<oliver>
<deBricassart> (anon)

Former Usernames

<creepypasta>

Throwaways

<zx01r3z>
<tfk>

Changeling Throwaways

Comments

[catphishing]

No. I'm sorry, but you don't get to act like you're looking out for his best interests. You don't have that right anymore.

[devilsavocado]

[ Matt doesn't get angry. Not visibly, at least. He stays calm but firm. Connor made a responsible choice, in Matt's eyes. A selfless choice. He's an adult, and Oliver is his boyfriend, but that doesn't make him his next of kin. ]

One of us has to have some respect for the dead. What you're doing now is ignoring his request like it was crazy to want to stop killing people. I know things haven't changed yet for you, and I'm sorry that Connor didn't see any other choice for keeping you safe, but you don't get to decide to uproot the life he's made here. Legally, you have no grounds for that.

[ Maybe if you hadn't rejected Connor's changes and moved out you wouldn't be sending such mixed messages, Oliver. ]

[catphishing]

[Oliver, meanwhile, is about as angry as it gets. He laughs, sharp and short, pacing restlessly.]

I really don't care what legal grounds I have. You murdered him. Don't act like him asking stops that being completely insane for you to go through with, or me wanting him away from you is somehow disrespectful to him. Maybe you don't believe it, but I want him to be safe, and after this? Keeping him safe means keeping him as far away as possible from people like you.

[devilsavocado]

He won't be dead for long.

[ Matt's been telling himself that, over and over. He has to believe it, the alternative would really break him. He speaks with resolve, though his attempt at playing it cool is dwindling. ]

Connor can make his own decisions. He can move out, I won't stop him. It's just... [ He tapers off but doesn't finish. Connor's gonna hate him if he spills. Matt knows he's been crying himself to sleep over the fact that Oliver hasn't accepted his changes. It would be a hell of an awkward thing to come back to. ] Let him be the one to choose who he lives with.

[ And look, he knows it's a poor decision, but he'll say it anyway. The anger is seeping in. ]

You're the one who moved out.

[catphishing]

[If it wasn't for that last part maybe he'd have been ready to negotiate. He knows how rough things have been between them. He knows Matt's seen it too. He's not willing for Connor to be around Matt, but it's not like he doesn't have other people who care for him too.

Except that? That is a sore spot. A choice he made where he knows Connor would have been hurt regardless of what he did. A reminder of just how incapable of being there for Connor he really is.]

Screw you. You think I made that choice lightly? You think I didn't do that for him as much as I did me? [His voice cracks, and the tears are flowing hot and freely again.] Staying would have ended us. Things have been complicated for us in ways you don't even understand.

I'm sorry I haven't been as supportive as I should have been. I really am. But you can't seriously think being around you is going to be any better.

[devilsavocado]

[ Shit, that was the wrong thing to say. But it feels good too, knowing Connor probably wouldn't have said it. Matt swallows, tilting his chin as he clenches his jaw again. Every time Connor talked about Oliver, something in his voice went still and died. Every time Connor thought Matt was asleep, he'd let himself break. The panic attacks had gotten worse since Oliver left.

Matt has no horse in this race, their relationship really is none of his business, but he cares about Connor. And Connor deserves someone who supports him, not someone who turns him away. He won't apologize for reminding Oliver of that. Still, his tears deflate Matt's anger pretty much instantly. It was a dick move, he knows it. All Matt does is nod, looking down and away for Oliver's benefit. ]

I can leave some of his stuff with Jade. If that would make you feel better. [ He shrugs, shutting off any emotion in his voice. ] I don't expect him to want to stay here. He has every right to be afraid of me once he's back.

[catphishing]

[It's not what he wants, but it's the best he's going to get from him and he knows it. He knows all too well he doesn't deserve to be the one who keeps Connor away from Matt, but it's important someone does. If that person is Jade instead of him then so be it.]

It would.

[devilsavocado]

Okay.

[ Matt nods. He'd spoken with Jade in the past so he at least trusts her not to want to torch him if he shows up at her door. Understandably, the rest of Connor's friends will be upset. Connor's gonna have a hell of a mess to clean up when he comes back.

Because he is coming back. He has to be. ]

I'll pick up some boxes tomorrow. He doesn't have to come back here if he doesn't want to. Once he decides, we'll go from there.

[catphishing]

All right. Fine.

[He hesitates, not quite sure what to do now. He wants to argue, wants to push to get Matt to leave Connor alone, but he's tired and devastated, and now the anger's faded a little he just wants to be away from here.]

I'll go then.

[devilsavocado]

Yeah. You probably should.

[ Matt keeps his gaze low. He won't forget what he's done, what he'll have to live with. Connor might forgive him, but it's unlikely he'd ever forgive himself. Winding down from it all leaves Matt with only his guilt to keep him company. He'd rather be alone than face a reminder of every mistake he told himself he'd never make.

Plus, what if he's ruined things between Connor and Oliver? Connor wouldn't forgive him for that. Even with all the tension between them, Matt knows they care about each other. He could hear it when they were around each other, and he can hear it now in Oliver's hitched breath and pained tone. ]

I am sorry, Oliver.

[catphishing]

I don't care.

[Sorry doesn't fix this. Unless Connor really does come back nothing will. But it's a relief to get out of there at least. With any luck he'll never have to look at him again.]